


Panic Room, Peaceful Rune

by kmsquill



Series: Antarctic Empire and Ranboo [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, BooTWT, Comfort, Dadza, DreamSMP - Freeform, Panic Attacks, Post-Manberg-Pogtopia War on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), minecraft youtubers - Freeform, ranboo is still traumatized, sleepytwt - Freeform, someone help i love him too much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:14:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28605795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmsquill/pseuds/kmsquill
Summary: Ranboo goes missing, and Phil has to search for the new kid that they've brought under their wing. He wasn't aware, however, how much the boy was truly traumatized by everything.Based off recent events from the DSMP! This isn't canon, but it's inspired off of recent events!//TW: DEPICTION OF PANIC ATTACK//REPOSTED FROM WATTPAD! User over there is xerusquill!
Series: Antarctic Empire and Ranboo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2099907
Comments: 20
Kudos: 586
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	Panic Room, Peaceful Rune

**Author's Note:**

> This wasn't canon and didn't actually happen; it was just inspired by near the end of Ranboo's stream today! Go watch it if you haven't yet :)
> 
> This writing feels a bit scuffed but oh well lol
> 
> im so excited for this trio you have no idea
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Phil knew that Ranboo was half enderman. He saw the purple particles that quietly buzzed around his lanky body, his ender-like skin glowing with lavender light in darkened shadows. He even made the quiet noises that endermen emitted sometimes when he was happy, blushing in embarrassment whenever Phil laughed at him.

So, yes, Phil knew that Ranboo was half enderman. Which could certainly lead to other enderman habits. Noises. His tall build. Panicking when someone made eye contact with him.

Teleporting.

Specifically, teleporting away from where he was supposed to be.

_Where the fuck did he go? ___

__“Aye, Techno!” Phil called up to Techno inside the house. He heard the creak of the door, watching the hybrid stumble out and blink tired eyes down at the senior. “Do you know where Ranboo is?”_ _

__“Am I supposed to know that?” Techno mumbled, his speech slightly slurred from sleep. Phil frowned with worry at his slightly delirious state, seeing the mangled braid Techno’s hair was still in and the heavy eyes lidding his drooping face. He looked exhausted._ _

__Phil couldn’t blame him; while Techno had shown obvious delight at the success of their mission, there was still an odd tension that he held whenever he talked about the massacre. He knew Techno must be repressing something, but he held back from asking. It would take a while for him to process things and even longer for him to admit it._ _

__“No worries, mate,” Phil assured, shaking his head. He gave him a loose grin. “You look like shit. You need sleep.”_ _

__“I do deserve some sleep,” Techno mused, managing a weak smile and waving briefly at Phil walking away before escaping back inside the cabin._ _

__Phil smiled watching him go, but Ranboo's disappearance was quickly on his mind again. He frowned as he studied the broken house beside them, walking over the snow and nudging the door open to check. Large gray heads turned to look at him, ears perked up curiously to greet the visitor. Phil looked around slowly, wading through the sea of fur and feeling their soft coats brush up against him as he walked through the house._ _

_Ranboo usually comes in here to calm down since the dog cage isn’t done yet, _Phil noted, a fond memory of Ranboo curled up asleep with dogs surrounding him coming back into his mind. It was one of his first days here, not wanting to intrude by staying in the main cabin and volunteering to sleep with the dogs since he was coined as the dog handler. He looked so tired; his limbs stuck out everywhere with at least two dogs resting against each leg and arm. His head had been resting against a wooden slab, his neck at a crooked angle, but he looked… Peaceful, in a way. As if he hadn’t slept well in a while.__

____Phil ran a hand through his thin blonde hair, sighing and shaking his head before turning and making his way out of the house. He squinted into the distance, but there was no sign of any life and no sight that the hybrid creature had left.____

_____ _

_Where the fuck? Where has he gone?_

____

____

_______ _ _ _

______Phil bit the inside of his cheeks, exhaling through his nose as he studied the farm on the other side of the cabin one more time before feeling his feet take him away as an idea of where he might be formed in his head. _Perhaps he went back to the crater. Maybe for memories or some shit. Or maybe resources?_______

_He wouldn’t need the resources, though. We’ve given him permission to use whatever he needs in our chests. Unless he felt bad, which… I suppose that makes sense._

____

____

_____ _

_____ _

__________The quiet gurgling and whispering of the nether portal filled his ears, and Phil closed his eyes as the portal transported him into the nether. He opened his eyes, slipping away from the arching obsidian and hustling quickly down the path towards the destroyed city. Ghasts let out soft wails and tried shooting fireballs at him, but he ignored it as he jumped along the ruins and netherrack pillars. As he was jumping along though, he felt suspicion heat up his blood and make his heart stop for a moment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_He’s not betraying us, is he?_

____

____

____________Phil wasn’t sure if he would, in all honesty. Everyone was still disoriented and in disarray after the massacre, trying to pick up the broken pieces of what was left, but… Who would he have joined, if anyone? Tubbo? Tommy?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________A quick flare of anger pulsed through him at the thought of Tommy, but he waved it away as he went through the portal and arrived in the central area of the server. He glanced around briefly before throwing a quick splash potion of invisibility he had picked up on the go just in case. When he shook his hands out and made sure his armor was off, he hustled along the streets. _Where exactly would he be? His old house ruins? Maybe just the ruins in general?_____________

_____ _

_____ _

______________His footsteps were soft; he felt like he was gliding with how amble his movement was as he made his way across the server. Being in this area always gave him unsettling feelings and memories, ones he would much rather not interact with. His fingers curled into fists briefly before he raced up the wooden bridge that led into the remains of L'Manburg, skidding to a stop as he stared out at the large crater where the acclaimed town used to be. His heart twitched with a weird sense of glee seeing it all gone; the bad memories of Techno’s execution and his house arrest were a little too fresh in his mind still to grieve a town that only ruined kind people._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Like Ranboo._

____

____

________________Phil shook his head, sighing again as he hopped up a few of the buildings and made his way up to a high vantage point to see everything better. The crater seeped deep into the Earth, only fragments of wood dangling in the air as remnants of the town. It was a much deeper hole than it had been before, practically unsalvageable and destroyed with no intention of coming back._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

When Phil continued examining everything, however, he couldn’t see any movement down below. It was completely desolate. After a moment of squinting into the distance, he gave up and leaned back. _He's not here. So then where is he?_

__

_______ _ _ _

__________________He let out another frustrated sigh, leaping down and landing with a quick water bucket softening his fall. He squinted out at the ocean to his left, making his way along the hillside and behind a few structures that had mostly survived the wither destruction to walk along the coast. He was still thinking, trying to figure out where he had gone._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_If he teleported somehow, I suppose he would be closer to home. But he doesn’t do it often, does he? He would’ve been back home by now anyways if he had. So he must’ve gone somewhere._

____

____

____________________Phil let out a thoughtful hum, continuing to move along the coastline before pausing as he heard a soft bark. He looked around for a moment before catching sight of the source, blinking in surprise at a wolf sitting next to a small fence post next to the water. He let out a soft whimper when Phil approached, his ears folding back when Phil ran his hand through the wolf’s fur._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________“Hello there,” Phil greeted, his tone softening. “Are you one of Techno’s? How’d you get out here?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

The wolf whined once more, but Phil gently tapped its snout to silence it as he heard another noise. When he caught wind of what the noise was again, his frown deepened in confusion. It sounded like… _Cats? What the hell?_

__

________________________Phil crouched next to the dog, his hand gently running over the dirt as he listened intently. Frantic meowing came from below his feet, directly underground. He stood up for a moment, looking around until he located the small hole the noise traveled through. When he looked down, a worried feline face was peering back up at him. Wide blue eyes framed the Siamese pattern, and he jolted with a start when he recognized the name dangling on its collar._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Jeffrey? Isn’t that one of Ranboo’s cats? ___

____

________________________He was about to hop down to investigate when another noise broke through the meowing. It sounded like labored breathing, breaths coming in and out at a fast pace that Phil knew was certainly unhealthy. _Is there some sort of animal dying down there? How is this cat alive? Aren't they under the water? How the hell did they get down there?_________________________

_____ _

_____ _

“Hello?” Phil called cautiously into the pit, studying the black and purple strikes of crying obsidian down below. It must've been manmade; there was no way in hell that was natural. He slowly got his water bucket out, pausing for a moment to see if anyone replied. The only response was the same breathing; it almost seemed to quicken when they heard him. _Could it be...?_

_____ _

_____ _

____________________________He jumped down into the hole, using the water to nullify his damage before quickly scooping it back up as Jeffrey was pushed away with a hysteric meow. He was pushed close to the form convulsed in the corner, the other two black cats rubbing around him and meowing worriedly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________________Phil froze when he entered this room, staring around at the obsidian walls and the signs decorating it. It was scrawled with frantic writing, encouraging words of “You are fine” dangling right above the hunched shape in the back. More words decorated the sides, still filled with scratched writing in black ink._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

He felt his hands tremble slightly, and for a moment he couldn’t breathe. The familiar weight of a sword plagued his mind and nestled its weight into his clenched fists. The walls seemed to expand from where he was standing, turning gray as soft brown eyes stared at him, a faint whisper in his ears. _“Kill me.”_

_____ _

_____ _

_Wilbur…_

____

____

________________________________“Phil?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Ranboo?_

____

____

__________________________________Phil snapped back into consciousness, exhaling and blinking rapidly as the previous images fell out of his mind and the figure slowly came back into his vision, hunched and shaking. His arms were wrapped tightly around his long legs, folded close and almost covering the entirety of his face. Wide eyes were staring at him, tears streaming down his face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________But when Phil took a closer look, he bit back a horrified gasp. It almost looked like Ranboo's face was… Melting. The enderman half of his body didn't look horrible; his bright green eye was wide and pained, glassy tears leaking from his eyes and running a bright purple trail down his cheek. But on his other side, his pale white side with his glowing red eye…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________The red eye seemed to be leaking down his cheek, the tears stained red and sizzling quietly on his skin. It almost looked like steam was curling off of them, turning the pale skin pink with gentle burns. His clawed hand kept reaching up, trying to wipe them away, but he flinched when the tears rolled onto his claws. He was shaking enough now that certain parts of his body almost looked blurry, as if his body was glitching and trying to teleport._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________It was... A nerve-wracking sight, to say in the least._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________“Ranboo…” Phil kept his voice quiet, crouching onto one knee to keep his distance and studying him as Ranboo’s eyes were fixed on his blurred fingers. “Hey… Can you hear me?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________Ranboo didn’t look up, his chest heaving as his hyperventilating continued. His eyes were still wide and panicked, glazed over and staring at the floor now. His thin tail coiled around his ankles, trembling._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Jesus. _Phil exhaled again, making sure his own mind was straightened out before he continued evenly, “Hey mate. Give me some type of sign to show that you can hear me, if you can?”__

____

____

____________________________________Finally, Ranboo’s eyes flickered up to his. Phil felt his chest squeeze gently at the fear in his heterochronic eyes, tears still dripping down his cheeks and quietly hissing where they burned his skin. His fingers were digging into his legs, small holes puncturing into his pants._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Oh, shit. Not good. _Phil sifted in his inventory for a moment before shaking his head, quickly whipping off his Antarctic cape and handing it over to Ranboo. “Here. Squeeze this.”__

____

____

______________________________________Ranboo hesitated, staring at Phil. He still looked panicked, but regained enough control to gasp out, “Don’t want… To rip…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________“Rip it all you want,” Phil huffed, forcing out a small laugh. “It’s been through shit.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________He shuffled quickly through his bags, glancing up briefly to see Ranboo clutching Phil’s dark blue cape as his breathing continued to rattle in his throat. He held it close to him, the fabric covering his long legs. Phil swore quietly to himself before scooting a little closer to the panicked boy, resting one of his hands on the end of his cloak and squeezing it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________“Squeeze the cloak, Ranboo,” Phil instructed. “Squeeze it. It’s really soft.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________Ranboo’s breathing was still uneven, but his eyes flicked down as his fingers combed through the material. He blinked rapidly, squeezing it tightly as he choked, “It is…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________“It’s made from very nice sheep wool,” Phil continued, his fingers much more smooth on the silken material than the clenched grasp Ranboo had on it. “Continue to feel it, Ranboo. Try to focus on the smooth material under your fingers. Very soft, very comforting.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Ranboo looked back down at the large cloak, trying to follow his instructions by flexing his fingers into the material, but his eyes kept flickering to the signs around him and filling with panic. Phil looked around as well at the signs, flinching. _I need to get him out of here. Those signs… Whatever this place is, it’s not good for him._

____

____

_Don’t think it’s good for me either._

____

____

__________________________________________Phil quickly brandished his trusted shovel, digging up through the dirt and making a staircase to the surface near the wolf. When he was done, he made his way back down slowly and studied the child still shivering on the floor._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________“Ranboo?” Phil tried once more, reaching out with a hesitant hand. “Are you alright if I move you? We… We need to leave this room.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________Ranboo was now back to hyperventilating too much for coherency, but he managed a small nod. Phil let him keep the cloak as he maneuvered around him, shifting around to his side and gently scooping his legs while getting a secure hold on his back. Ranboo flinched sharply at his touch, almost making Phil loose his grip. He let out a small grunt, adjusting the odd weight in his arms and looking down as Ranboo's arms wrapped tightly around the cloak and his eyes fixated on one of the signs in the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________Phil didn’t bother looking at the sign, feeling the same sense of dread creep back from his memory as he made sure the cats stayed sitting where they were before making his way up the formed staircase. The tall boy was still trembling despite the heavy cloak draped over him, his staggered breathing brushing Phil’s neck._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

“Shit,” Phil muttered, glancing up at the fading sun and realizing how far they were from the portal. He glanced down at the shivering enderman hybrid before sighing, adjusting his grip once more very briefly before starting the trek. _Hopefully he’ll calm down by the time we’re at the portal so he can walk._

____

____

With that thought, Phil navigated his way around the shattered buildings and onto the broken path, walking along it slowly and being able to avoid the holes before they continued on the fixed bridge. Phil’s back and knees felt sore after a while, his arms losing feeling as the exhaustion from the massacre started to weigh him down. _Dammit. This is harder with an extremely tall child._

____

____

______________________________________________He glanced down at Ranboo after a while, relieved when he felt a more even breathing pattern hitting his skin. The boy still had small tremors running along his body, but his eyes looked a little more clear and his deathgrip on the cape had loosened. His head was now turned to the side instead of pressed up against Phil’s neck, staring now at the fading scenery._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil smiled a little, asking softly, “Ranboo? How are you feeling, mate?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Ranboo’s long ears flicked up, hearing his voice, and he responded weakly, “Phil?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil could hear the soreness in his throat, dried up from the gasping sobs earlier. His smile felt more pained, and he adjusted his arms to get some feeling back into them before telling him gently, “Don’t worry mate, we’ll get you home.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Phil…” Ranboo trailed off quietly, but he didn’t speak any further as Phil continued on the path. His eyes flashed briefly with pain and confusion when they passed through the destroyed Community House, his claws digging into the cloak, but relaxed when they passed through it and climbed up the stone stairs to the nether portal. His eyes squinted when they went through, burrowing into Phil nervously when they walked along the bridges. His eyes cleared a little more, watching the ghasts glide around._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil watched the ghasts for a moment as well before looking back down at Ranboo with a small grin, reflecting on his pale skin and the ghast tear appearance his tears had taken. “Aren’t you half ghast too? Along with being half enderman?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“I think so,” Ranboo mumbled, adding in a quieter voice, “I don’t actually… Remember.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil winced, falling silent as he hopped along the pillars across the lava pits. He swayed a few times due to Ranboo’s lanky body, the boy's claws digging into his chest and Phil swearing quietly as he did so, but he managed to make it across without dropping Ranboo or tipping over into the lava and made it to their portal._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________The cooling liquid matter of the nether portal was welcoming to Phil, letting out a slow breath of relief that the perilous journey was almost over. It was now slowly fading into the nighttime when they emerged back on the surface, the sound of ocean waves meeting Phil's ears. The chill of the cold beach eventually greeted him, his feet growing cold as he stepped into the snow and walked along the sloping dunes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Phil,” Ranboo croaked out as Phil climbed up the hill with him, starting to shift in the man’s hold. “I… I can walk on my own if-”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Nah,” Phil interrupted with a short laugh, trying to hide how strained his breathing was. “Panic attacks can be exhausting. Just relax until we make it back.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“How…” Ranboo tried. He coughed to clear his throat, making his tone a little less raspy as he asked quietly, “How did you know it was a panic attack?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil paused for a moment as the cabin loomed into sight, the silhouette of Techno standing in front with his mask on as he waved at them. Phil could feel himself smile weakly again, admitting as he continued, “Techno and Wilbur had them. Techno doesn’t have ‘em anymore, but Wilbur…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil's heart seized, a quick image of Wilbur’s tears soaking his shoulder as he went limp under his arms. He bit his lip, the pain distracting him as he continued in a hoarse voice, “He had them more frequently.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Ranboo stayed quiet as Phil continued along, Techno walking up to meet them halfway. Phil could see his eyes arch under the mask, the small lines of where his eyebrows were wrinkling the pig skin. “What happened here? Sprained ankle?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Panic attack,” Phil replied shortly due to lack of breath, and Techno stiffened. His eyes flickered down to Ranboo, who pressed more into Phil and tore his gaze away from Techno’s in shame._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Instead of more ridicule, however, Techno turned and quietly led them up the stairs. Techno opened up the door for them, and the warmth of the house immediately hit Phil with a sigh of relief as he glanced over at the fireplace heating up the room. The books and chests were situated just as they had been before, glowing softly under the orange light of the flames. As Techno disappeared down the ladder to a lower level of the house, Phil went over to the bed and finally set Ranboo down, his arms flushing and finally gaining feeling again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“Jesus,” Phil grunted with another laugh after he let him go, backing away and shaking his arms out. “I don’t know how I actually traveled that whole way without dropping you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Ranboo was still for a moment on the bed, laying on his side where Phil had left him with the cloak still in his grasp. Finally, he slowly rolled and sat up, placing his feet carefully on the ground and holding the cloak closer as he stared at the fire. He flinched a little when Techno climbed up from the lower floor, but looked surprised when the pig hybrid walked over and handed him a freshly brewed bowl of soup._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“How’re you feeling?” Techno asked Ranboo, a gentleness in his tone that startled Phil enough to make his eyes arch at the anarchist. But the pig hybrid ignored his look; his attention stayed on the young boy in front of them._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“I…” Ranboo hesitated, staring down at the bowl before sighing, shaking his head. “I don’t know. I’m sorry. I just… I feel so confused right now.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________“That’s normal,” Techno sympathized, backing away from him. He looked over at Phil, his expression now unreadable underneath the mask. “Panic attacks are usually pretty tirin’. Really mentally draining.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Phil swallowed thickly as he met Techno's gaze, his words suddenly getting lost in the back of his throat. Techno turned away, nodding to Ranboo before stepping away. “ I’ll let you rest in here for the night.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Ranboo and Phil watched him disappear down the ladder, the fire crackling filling the brief moment of silence. Phil finally let out a quiet grunt as he stretched out, walking back over to Ranboo and glancing at him. Ranboo wordlessly moved aside, letting Phil sit down next to him on the bed. They sat together for another moment in silence, Phil glancing over and watching the fire's glare graze over Ranboo’s tired and haunted expression. He suddenly looked much older than he was._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Just a kid, yet he’s been through so much shit._

____

____

________________________________________________“Ranboo,” Phil spoke up after a moment, making Ranboo jump slightly. After a quiet apology, Phil asked hesitantly, “How did… How did you end up in that room? What even was that room?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Ranboo’s ears flattened, his hair looking mangled as he scratched the back of his neck. He frowned at the flames for a long moment, his hands now rubbing his arms before he finally explained in a muted tone, “I… I was going back so I could start moving my pets. I… I started to take them out, but…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________He paused for a moment, and Phil glanced over to see the many different emotions pass on his face before it morphed over into pain. “That room… It’s basically a panic room, I suppose… It’s where I go when I… Y’know, panic.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________His hands folded into his lap, hunching over as his lips tightened with a tense expression full of clouding confusion. “I… I don’t know what happened, exactly. I guess it just… Everything that's happened, everything piled in on me again, and…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil saw his hands start to shake, and he instinctively rested one of his hands over his to try and stop them. When Ranboo jumped a little again, Phil spoke quickly, “Hey, hey, I get it. You don’t need to explain.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Ranboo let out a shaky breath, nodding in gratitude. Phil removed his hand, letting them hang loosely as he looked back over at the fire. He tested the waters, questioning carefully, “Does that… Happen a lot?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Ranboo’s expression became strained as he kept his eyes on the fire. “It… Can happen frequently, yes. It’s more of a… A spiral, I suppose? It feels more like a… An argument with myself instead of a panic attack.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Ranboo looked down at his hands, wrapping them around his torso as he smiled weakly. “I tend to argue with myself a lot, too.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil looked over at Ranboo, a wave of sympathy coursing over him. He let out a small sigh, his eyes moving back over to the fire as he apologized quietly, “I’m sorry about that.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________“Don’t be! It’s not your fault.” Ranboo glanced up at Phil, a timid smile on his face. “You, uh… You actually saved me, you know. The day of the massacre.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil tilted his head, letting out a confused laugh. “Well, I mean yeah. You were homeless.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Ranboo shook his head. “No, no. Not that. Well, yes, that is true, but…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________He exhaled slowly, fidgeting with his fingers before finally looking back up at Phil with the same timid smile. “You saved me. From… From one of my spirals. Just like you saved me today.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________His head tilted up a little, his expression soft with gratitude. “I can’t thank you enough for saving me. Both today, and… Back at the massacre. I honestly can’t thank you enough for offering me shelter. It's... It's really helped me. A lot."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil smiled a little, watching the moonbeams shining through the window carve gently into Ranboo’s hair and light up his genuine expression. Out of instinct, he reached out and ruffled his hair, chuckling. “We’re happy to have you here, Ranboo. And I’m glad I could save you from your panic room.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil removed his hand, waving around them at the cabin walls. “At least now you have our peaceful little rune out in the snow away from everyone.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________“Away from everyone,” Ranboo echoed, but his expression drooped a little as his eyes clouded. He looked back over at the fire, his expression drooping with loss._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________Phil’s smile faded a little, but he could feel another sympathetic ping in his chest. “I know it sucks being away from those you considered your friends, but-”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________________________________“Were they?” Ranboo suddenly interrupted, looking up at Phil with the same confused expression he wore when trying to recount memories just beyond his reach. His eyes were still glassy, searching desperately. “Were they my friends?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Phil bit his lip, hesitating for a long moment. He knew whatever he said next could be dangerous. _This boy has had quite the trauma. He might believe whatever I say. I could try to comfort him somehow or sway him away from them, but…_

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__________________________________________________Sticking with his gut, Phil replied as honestly as he could. “They had been, yes. But it seems like they’re… Just confused at the moment. Which is why you’re here.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________“Yes,” Ranboo murmured, but it sounded like it was meant for himself as he glanced back at the fire before looking back at Phil with a hopeful smile. “But you and Techno are my friends, right?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________Phil felt his smile return. “Of course, mate." He reached out to ruffle his hair again, letting out a laugh when the hybrid shook his hair out and the mess of small curls hopped around on his forehead. “You’re our friend. Even Techno considers you at least neutral; he won’t hurt you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________Ranboo relaxed, his smile a little more genuine at the reassurance. “Okay. That’s… That’s good.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________Ranboo hesitated for a long moment before folding his legs up, his long limbs tucked under him. He scooted a little closer to Phil, smiling a little. “Thank you, Phil.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________Phil studied him for a moment, his memory quickly bringing back another image that was much more pleasant than the ones before. Brown curls, spiraling everywhere from the boy’s head in his lap while Phil ran his fingers through his hair and hummed a soft song that the boy always seemed to fall asleep to. The paternal feeling grew, branching into his heart from an old seed of parental instinct that had been sowed long ago._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________________________________With that image, Phil scooted back to rest against the wall and reached forward, grasping Ranboo’s head gently and bringing it down to rest in his lap. The boy let out a surprised noise, one that sounded eerily like a curious enderman and making Phil laugh. Ranboo’s ears twitched in embarrassment, but the boy froze when Phil’s fingers started to comb through his hair. Ranboo blinked rapidly for a moment, staring at a place on the roof in befuddlement before finally letting himself relax, a small smile on his face. He let out a content sigh, his eyes staring into the last few embers of the fire still glowing at the corner of the room before drifting shut. Phil continued to let his fingers wade through the boy’s split hair, a feeling of nostalgia and peace settling over him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________________He let out a soft sigh, glancing up when he heard quiet footsteps after a few moments. He met eyes with Techno, who had taken the mask off and was now meeting Phil’s icy blue gaze with his own unmasked crimson. He studied the sleeping Ranboo for a moment, his eyes flickering to Phil’s fingers in his hair before chuckling and shaking his head, turning away and teasing, “You really are a dad, huh?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________________Phil huffed a little, watching Techno climb back down. When the man was gone, he looked back down at Ranboo. His body was rising and falling with even breaths now, any trace of pain or confusion from earlier now smoothed over into relaxed lines of sleep. Against his will, Phil could feel a few tears building up in his eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_I failed one son, _he whispered to himself internally, his fingers twitching at the painful admittance.__

_And while Ranboo certainly could never take any of my son's spots..._

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_I won't fail to keep this kind-hearted boy safe from everyone trying to hurt him._

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________________________________________________________________________As his eyes slowly drifted shut, a flicker of determination settled into his chest and burned fiercely, stronger than the flames of the fire and the brute force of a hundred men._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_I swear on my life._

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______________________________________________________________~_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> i really hate ao3's editing system LOL
> 
> dadza for ranboo makes me soft
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed! Comments, kudos, and shares anywhere are greatly appreciated <3


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